Star Trek TNG: In the Homestretch / by Mark

We’ve got 8 episodes remaining of TNG--

  • The Enterprise crew is going through "Genesis". Data's cat Spot is pregnant (why wouldn't a starship cat be spayed or neutered?), so we begin in Sickbay (apparently Dr. Crusher is a veterinarian too). Worf's doing some weapons testing and manages to lose a photon torpedo--wouldn't they just auto-explode after X minutes?--so Picard and Data go in a shuttle to find it. Troi and Worf, now officially a couple, are bickering about the ship's temperature, to the point that Troi is sitting in a hot bath with her uniform on. Worf suddenly has venom sacs, which he uses to attack Crusher (McFadden directed the episode, so this conveniently takes her out of action). Riker and many other crewman are forgetting things. The only one doing well is Barclay, who got a technobabble injection before this all started. Picard and Data return to find the ship adrift. They go onto the ship (with no protection other than phasers?!?) to find a devolved crew. Troi's a lizard, Worf's a snake, Riker's a Cro-Magnon, Barclay's a spider. The make-up crew had their work cut out for them. After more technobabble, and Picard leading Snake-Worf on a merry chase, Data saves the day.
  • Ugh--Wesley's back in "Journey's End". He's on vacation (on a starship?) from the Academy--a flimsy excuse to get him back one last time. The Federation has worked out official borders between them and the Cardassians, and the Enterprise is assigned to move a colony of American Indians (message coming in, sir). Meanwhile, Wesley has switched from ugly sweaters to ugly jackets, and dismisses Geordi's engineering work. We get a lot of New Age technobabble from the colonists. Turns out that one of therm saw Wesley in a "vision quest", so he goes on one himself. The colonists figure out that Picard's ancestor was involved in an Indian massacre, which leaves him in a quandary--especially when the Cardassians arrive early. Wesley's sees his father (Doug Wert) during his quest, who tells him not to follow his path, and decides to help the colonists vs. the Feds. Picard is furious, and Wesley resigns from the Academy. He has a final touching scene with Dr. Crusher, then goes down to the planet. A fight breaks out, and the colonist reveals himself as "The Traveler" from Season One. Picard convinces the Cardassians to stand down, and the colonists decide to stay in the Cardassian empire. Wesley stays with them to continue his journey.
  • Again with Cousin Oliver/Alexander! In "Firstborn", Worf's prepping him for "Ascension" (more Klingon mumbo-jumbo), and Alexander isn't having it. Picard suggests he get some time with other Klingons, so they use the flagship of the Federation to go to an outpost. The festivities (Klingon opera/fighting) are interrupted by a real attack on Worf, but he's saved by a friend of his family (James Sloyan). It's time for Klingon intrigue! We get a cameo from Quark on DS9, a holodeck fighting simulator, and the wacky Klingon sisters (they're like the Patty and Selma of TNG). Finally, we learn that the "old family friend" is actually Alexander from the future(?!?), there to try to change his life. Of course, his being there changes the future anyway. All in all--meh.
  • It seems like they're using scripts from the slush pile to round out the series--or perhaps they got hold of some soap opera scripts. In "Bloodlines", Picard now has a secret son! He had a liaison with a girl early in his career, and an old Ferengi adversary swears vengeance. They track down 24-year old Jason Vigo (Ken Olandt) and beam him up. A quick genetic test later--yep, he's Picard's son. Picard tries to warm up to Jason, but he's not very open. Turns out he's a minor criminal--nothing serious. The Ferengi taunts Picard, then Jason suddenly has seizures. Some technobabble later, we learn that the Ferengi is using a transporter that can travel over several light years--one of these concepts which is conveniently forgotten later. Picard and Jason bond over a holodeck rock climb, even joking about his future hairline--then Jason is beamed off the ship. Picard uses the same method to follow him--then announces Jason is not his son (Crusher figured it out)--it was a scam by the Ferengi. Picard stops the Ferengis, and drops off Jason.

I'm hoping the final four episodes are better than these.  Star Trek: The Next Generation is available on Netflix. Happy Halloween!